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The Truth About... One Night Stands One night stands are either an accident or an adventure. The accident may be the equivalent of a stubbed toe or a motorway pile up, depending on the situation. The adventure? Well, that’s down to you and your insignificant other… What's it all about? The term 'one night stand' originally referred to touring theatre companies who gave one performance before moving on to the next venue. The ONS of a sexual nature usually involves the meeting of like minds (both up for it) and at least one with no intention of repeating the exercise in any kind of long-term scenario, if ever.A small research group organised by the University of Sheffield recently revealed that nine out of 10 women thought one night stands were immoral. However, other surveys suggest that over half the population have actually had one - and they can’t all be men or perpetually wracked with guilt… So what’s it to be? a) A searing night of never-to-be-repeated passion - you are sex in female form, you rock, you roll, you are a wanton harlot with an ear-to-ear grin, or... b) An appalling error of judgment destined to take up permanent residence under ‘Oh my god, what was I thinking?’ The accident waiting to happen A one night stand is about no-strings sex. This falls on its head when one half of the equation wants to follow up with a relationship. If at all possible, manage expectations and make it clear, ladies and gentlemen, that you're here for one night only. Waking up with a hangover next to ‘the man with no name’ is not a great start to the day. Beware the booze for it sits smirking behind many dubious shenanigans. It can also bring about an unfortunate case of brewer’s droop in your man of the moment. And beer goggles aren’t just a guy thing… Fall asleep next to Brad Pitt, wake up next to Paul Daniels it's magic! The ONS is also no place for the shrinking violet. Be upfront about what you want, where you want to be and if you've got to be up in the morning, let him know. One night stands work best without guesswork and there's no reason to be rude, even if he doesn't live up to expectations. Be wary of mistaking sex for intimacy. This kind of spontaneous flesh baring is rarely accompanied by a baring of souls. That belongs to long-term relationships and conversations with your girlfriends. As do hugs. If you're looking for emotional support, this is not the man to offer it. The adventure of a lifetime The flip side of all this is that sex with a stranger can be a mind-blowingly liberating experience - and the chance to do things you wouldn't normally dare to do. You have no past together and probably no future, but you can have one hell of a present. For a brief encounter par excellence, pick a bad boy. He's so unsuitable it makes your hair stand on end, but for one night only, he's all a girl could want and he'll give you license to be bad too, so unleash your wild side and save the good guys for something deeper. A one night stand tends to be the result of sizzling chemistry and body language that screams louder than words. If you do open your mouth to speak, ply each other with sexy compliments. Tell him it's so, so good. If it is. Or tell him what you want if it isn't - after all, you're only in it for the sex. If that's not up to much, why bother? And if he rocked your world, let him know in a (single) text or quick phone call afterwards. After all, you may not want a relationship, but nice girls are always polite and who knows, it might win you a repeat performance sometime. |
