The top 10 essential flirting tips
Brush up on your flirtation techniques and get seduction off to a flying start.
A sexy social lubricant, flirtation is the most fun you can have with your clothes on - and the best way to get them off. Here’s how to get it right.
1. Be body conscious
Body language speaks volumes and flirtation goes hand in hand with being relaxed, confident, open and expressive.
It says: I’m someone with a lot to offer.
Golden rules: Ditch negatives such as crossed arms or slouching.
2. Make eye contact
When you fancy someone, your pupils dilate, which in turn makes you more attractive - so hold their gaze for a few seconds and let your eyes do the talking.
It says: I like what I see.
The golden rule: Don’t over-use direct eye contact – you’ll seem intense or even creepy.
3. Flash that smile
A warm, genuine smile removes barriers and makes connections.
It says: I’m approachable and having fun.
The golden rule: If they don’t reciprocate, move on. Flirting is about enjoying yourself.
4. Lip service
When you’ve got the hots for someone you’ll spend more time looking at their mouth – it just happens. Try doing it on purpose occasionally and your intentions will be even clearer.
It says: I’m thinking about kissing you.
The golden rule: Don’t stare. It makes people self-conscious.
4. Body talk
We unconsciously point our bodies towards someone we’re attracted to, so let them know by turning yours to face them.
It says: It’s just you and me in the room.
The golden rule: Don’t invade their personal space: avoid too close too soon.
5. Do what they do
Mirror their movements and posture. If they tilt their head, lean forwards or gesture, do the same shortly afterwards.
It says: We’re two of a kind.
The golden rule: Don’t copy their every move - and ignore negative body language such as crossed arms.
6. Talk the talk
For first impressions, the way we say things is more important than what we say - but when it comes to conversation, keep it playful.
It says: I’m baggage-free and fun to be with.
The golden rule: No moaning, bitching or unburdening.
7. The power of suggestion
Flirting is about teasing in what could be, so be as provocative and suggestive as you like - but test the water to make sure it’s appropriate and build up to the sexier stuff gradually.
It says: I know what I want.
The golden rule: Avoid smutty double entendres or innuendos.
8. Be attentive
Give that person your undivided attention. Ask questions, listen, laugh in all the right places and share in equal measures.
It says: I think you’re fascinating/intriguing/funny
The golden rule: Make them feel important
9. Touch yourself
Assuming you’re both fully clothed, this is about drawing attention to the skin that’s exposed - your ears, neck, mouth or cheek.
It says: I’d like you to touch me.
The golden rule: Keep it subtle and light – you’re not scratching an itch.
10. Don’t take it too seriously
Flirting doesn’t always end in sex – and quite often it shouldn’t. You’ll flirt with far more people than you’ll ever sleep with and that’s a good thing.
It says: I’m confident, sexy and enjoying myself – and want you to feel the same.
The golden rule: Remember, it’s supposed to be fun.
A sexy social lubricant, flirtation is the most fun you can have with your clothes on - and the best way to get them off. Here’s how to get it right.
1. Be body conscious
Body language speaks volumes and flirtation goes hand in hand with being relaxed, confident, open and expressive.
It says: I’m someone with a lot to offer.
Golden rules: Ditch negatives such as crossed arms or slouching.
2. Make eye contact
When you fancy someone, your pupils dilate, which in turn makes you more attractive - so hold their gaze for a few seconds and let your eyes do the talking.
It says: I like what I see.
The golden rule: Don’t over-use direct eye contact – you’ll seem intense or even creepy.
3. Flash that smile
A warm, genuine smile removes barriers and makes connections.
It says: I’m approachable and having fun.
The golden rule: If they don’t reciprocate, move on. Flirting is about enjoying yourself.
4. Lip service
When you’ve got the hots for someone you’ll spend more time looking at their mouth – it just happens. Try doing it on purpose occasionally and your intentions will be even clearer.
It says: I’m thinking about kissing you.
The golden rule: Don’t stare. It makes people self-conscious.
4. Body talk
We unconsciously point our bodies towards someone we’re attracted to, so let them know by turning yours to face them.
It says: It’s just you and me in the room.
The golden rule: Don’t invade their personal space: avoid too close too soon.
5. Do what they do
Mirror their movements and posture. If they tilt their head, lean forwards or gesture, do the same shortly afterwards.
It says: We’re two of a kind.
The golden rule: Don’t copy their every move - and ignore negative body language such as crossed arms.
6. Talk the talk
For first impressions, the way we say things is more important than what we say - but when it comes to conversation, keep it playful.
It says: I’m baggage-free and fun to be with.
The golden rule: No moaning, bitching or unburdening.
7. The power of suggestion
Flirting is about teasing in what could be, so be as provocative and suggestive as you like - but test the water to make sure it’s appropriate and build up to the sexier stuff gradually.
It says: I know what I want.
The golden rule: Avoid smutty double entendres or innuendos.
8. Be attentive
Give that person your undivided attention. Ask questions, listen, laugh in all the right places and share in equal measures.
It says: I think you’re fascinating/intriguing/funny
The golden rule: Make them feel important
9. Touch yourself
Assuming you’re both fully clothed, this is about drawing attention to the skin that’s exposed - your ears, neck, mouth or cheek.
It says: I’d like you to touch me.
The golden rule: Keep it subtle and light – you’re not scratching an itch.
10. Don’t take it too seriously
Flirting doesn’t always end in sex – and quite often it shouldn’t. You’ll flirt with far more people than you’ll ever sleep with and that’s a good thing.
It says: I’m confident, sexy and enjoying myself – and want you to feel the same.
The golden rule: Remember, it’s supposed to be fun.
